I didn’t know what to call this – it’s advice to you, advice to younger girls, advice I’ll tell my daughters, advice I wish I’d been told, and advice that I need right now. I hope you reading this can find something helpful.
- Growing up is confusing. Sometimes you might feel as if you’re losing your identity as you invent and reinvent yourself with each new mental, emotional, and physical development. Sometimes it feels like your mind is ahead of your body in maturity, and visa-versa. One day you might wake up and not realise who you are anymore. That’s okay – that’s growing up. Don’t lose yourself. Development is good, so embrace it. Get to know who you are, and pinpoint your values. Be proud of them.
- [This is something I’m trying to tell myself right now]: NEVER STRESS BECAUSE YOU FEEL LIKE YOU’RE NOT AT THE POINT IN LIFE YOU THINK YOU SHOULD BE AT. And stop comparing yourself to others. Everyone’s path of life is SO different. Your early twenties are terrifying. Everyone around you is graduating and getting internships and postgrad jobs and travelling and you’re not. And that’s okay. It’s all going to happen the way it should. Remember that.
- Never take problems from your old relationships into new ones. Don’t enforce unfair and damagingly poor expectations on a new boyfriend that you learnt from old lovers. Every man teaches you something new and wonderful. Take the good lessons. Be cautious, but don’t tarnish someone with an old brush.
- Take some risks. Do some shit. You’re young. Never ever punish yourself for being young and making mistakes. It all sculpts your morals and values and ultimately the person you are today. Plus you end up with some great stories and some sordid secrets. Stay out until 6am even though you’ll be tired at work the next day. Kiss that boy. Send that text.
- SKIN. Take care of your skin. It’s such a trial and error thing that takes years to understand, but once you get it, you’re sorted. Please take your makeup off before bed. I got away with 18 years of not doing so, and I REGRET IT SO MUCH. Take your damn makeup off. Every night. I don’t CARE if you’ve been dancing on tables until 5am, you get home, and even if you’re using devil face wipes, get that makeup off your face. And drink some water.
- Speaking of skin; PUT SPF ON YOUR FACE. Get a good daily moisturiser with a decent SPF in it. Even everyday British sunshine and UV exposure is damaging. You won’t regret it, I promise.
- Never underestimate the power of sisterhood. Your girl friends will inspire you, educate you, support you, empower you. Appreciate them.
- Clean your room! A tidy space is reflective of your mental state and helps you think better. I promise it helps to make things seem not quite as daunting and impossible. A tidy desk and living space helps me feel like I can start anything on my To-Do list.
- That boy you’re obsessing over and making excuses for because he’s not texting you back, probably isn’t interested. If he ain’t replying, go read a book. Do a face mask. Messaging you shouldn’t be an exhausting task for him.
- Laughter is the most amazing medicine for bad moods. Surround yourself with people who make you laugh effortlessly.
- Along those lines, take time to pamper yourself. Do a hair mask or a face mask. Paint your nails. Read. Go for a run if you need to blow off some steam. Have a shower, fake tan; do whatever makes you feel that little bit more accomplished and complete. You’re a goddess in your own right. Look after yourself.
I hope this helped at least one person reading! I needed some of this advice right now, so I figured someone else might benefit from my words, too. If anyone has any incredible advice for pulling yourself out of crippling writers block, that would be stellar.
Have a fab day, guys.